Thursday, February 5, 2009

In Place of Something Better

So I've been working on a big blog post, one that is more thought out and prepared than most, but it's taking way too long so I'm going to post a sympathy blog, just so I can keep up with my self-determined quota.

I looked over a book recently. It seemed interesting at first glance, suggesting that it was a book about common phrases - their meanings and their origins. My interest soon turned into disappointment as the book proved to lack some of my favorite phrases. I will post these here and my understanding of what their meanings are and their origins. Why, you ask? To educate the masses, that's why.

"Blow this pop stand" (Can be used with 'Let's' or 'It's time to').
As seen on the semi-popular TV show Miami Vice. Meaning "To exit or remove oneself from a less than exciting location or environment." So next time you're bored or even if you just want to sound cool like me, you can use this phrase while exiting. Just don't use it when making small talk with an undercover police officer while holding a stick of dynamite next to a pop stand. Some of us learn those tough lessons so the rest of you don't have to...

"Too Hot to Trot"
Some people consider this to mean very attractive. Actually the phrase can be attributed to the early settlers in the Southern United States who would complain when the weather became too hot for their horses to run, this led to many a slow pursuits for bandits and other hooligans on horseback. It also was used in the American Civil War when it was too hot for people to catch dysentery, or at least it was too hot for them to show symptoms of the horrible disease (or was it a virus, or do disease and virus mean the same thing? If so, was it a bacterial infection then, and is that a virus too?)

"Keeping It Real"
To be authentic, true to oneself; to be cool. 'Nuff said. This phrase was stared by none other than myself. j/k. The "keeping it real" hysteria can be linked back to when, in our capitalist society, companies started creating similar products to original products, and the original products starting using the phrase "keeping it real" to prove that they were the authentic version of a highly processed food. Not to be confused with the phrase "Keeping it Seal" created by singer/songwriter Seal.

"Tru Dat" & "Word"
Phrase combination used by one or two parties. Used to signify agreement. Can be linked back to Algonquian nations of Native Americans, used when trading with English settlers.

"Good Times"
It is hard to pinpoint the exact moment in history when this phrase started, since, historically, there have been many "good times". In present day use, "Good Times" can be used not only in reference to good times, but also in reference to bad times such as "My Grandmother's finger exploded. Good times." When used in this form, the phrase "Good Times" establishes the end of a discussion on a topic. Since nothing else can be said about the event, "good times" establishes that no more needs to be said. Also used when reminiscing about "good times".

"True Story"
Similar to the historical roots and meaning of "good times". Can be used in place of "good times" when a listener seems to be skeptical about a given story, or to reinforce the use of "good times". Example: "My Grandmother's finger exploded - true story. Good times".

"He's/She's a Winner"
Winners have been around since the beginning of time, but it wasn't until the turn of the century that sarcasm was discovered, giving this phrase new meaning. If someone tells you that you are a "winner" and it's not your Grandmother/Father, Mother/Father, Significant other/other person who would lie to you, then it means you aren't a winner, you're actually the opposite. Listen to me, you no longer want to be a winner, it's no longer cool. You also don't want to be a loser because that's not cool either. You just want to never be defined as either a winner or a loser and you'll never be caught on someone's judgemental radar.


Amanda said...

Not capable of leaving a witty comment today but wanted to say thank you for the much needed laugh :). This is genuinely the best blog I read!

... said...

Some of your finest work :)

I chortled several times while reading (which you already know since I was sitting right next to you). The only thing bad about this post is I then scrolled up after reading, and was filled with impotent rage at the site of the vile Octomom.

Oh, and no tags? Not tagging a post is one of the seven deadly sins - True story! Good times. Word.

- Trik'Quest'Shun